Meditation

In 2017, in a desperate moment in the Milwaukee airport, I found meditation.

I was stressed about work* and headed to Vegas for a bachelorette party. I was struggling with what I later learned was an allergic reaction to my contacts.

I was panicked.

So, I turned to the app store and found Headspace.

Since then--coming up on 9 years--I've been a near-daily meditator.

Meditation has taught me two things:

One: we are not ever going to turn off our thoughts. Meditation is not a tool for that. It is a tool for awareness and presence.

Two: we are all humans and part of a shared condition--our humanity.

This last bit has been particularly helpful to me as I've climbed the ranks of Midwest Big Law.

Attorneys, despite what we often believe and project about ourselves, are not special.

We're not above other humans because of our degrees and bar passages.

And: we're not immune to common, basic, normal human experiences, either.

With this lesson and a deep desire to be wholly and authentically myself if I was going to stay in big law, I set out to do my career differently and more sustainably.

Yes, I work hard (and a lot).

Yes, I enjoy the prestige of the job.

Yes, I still struggle with stress, anxiety, worry, and doubts.

But, I am empowered** to do so genuinely and to bring that humanity into every aspect of my life--including my client and firm work.

✌🏻🔥♥️

*Naturally, I cannot remember what was stressing me on that 2017 day in the airport. Funny how that happens.

**My firm, Husch Blackwell, has been remarkably (I often say miraculously) supportive of me (alongside many of my HB colleagues). I will be forever grateful for that.